Good Friday & Easter

 The 3rd day after Jesus was crucified and buried, 

Jesus took on our sins and was crucified for us on the cross. By doing so, he was able to redeem us of our sins and of judgement, allowing us to be presented as righteous in front of God. His resurection is our salvation. And that is the true essence of Good Friday and Easter.

Good Friday commemorates when Jesus died for us. And Easter is when he resurrected.

So when we celebrate this, we celebrate the finished work. We celebrate His love for us. His willingness to take our sins as His and enduring all the persecution Himself. Even for those who have not been born and have yet believed in Him. He died for every Christian across time who would believe in Him.

It’s not about bunnies and eggs…. Jesus did not come back as a rabbit or get reborn. He came back exactly as He was before the crucifix Tian, except for the additional scars, nail wounds.

And He didn’t blame anyone for what He went through. Instead, He asked God to forgive all of them; all of Us.

I believe that what was said and done there, is applicable even till today. Everyone that has been criticising Jesus as something He isn’t. And Him asking for forgiveness as He died, was applicable to humans across the entire length of time.

Jesus… you saw all of us in 1 linear timeline and know every single one Christian that you have saved.

I believe that me and my partner and our future kids are in that group, even if they aren’t yet.

Thank you for giving us this precious gift of forgiveness and right standing with God that allows us to ask of whatever we want and know that God will grant us so long as we have faith.

Happy Good Friday and Resurrection Sunday.

Happy Birthday Jesus

Nowadays, Christmas flies by faster than I can say the word. 1 day of celebrating with extended family and it's over.

In fact, as soon as Christmas Day is done, the Lunar New Year decorations start going up and CNY music is played in some of the shopping Malls. Some places are smart at reusing some of the Christmas Lights for the CNY Lights.

I'm not sure if it's me or if it's the general vibe that the Christmas vibe seems to be missing.

Maybe my missing church and not staying in touch with God has made me abit numb to the Christmas feels or that the world has made Christmas too commercial that I don't feel the warm fuzzies.

I always believed that Christmas isnt the exact time of when Jesus was born. If anything, it's a symbolic date to commemorate his birth. A reminder of not his birth but Him taking human form and starting His work to save us... something that i forget to reflect on int he other 364 days of the year. What a terrible Christian I am...

My life has taken a turn where I will soon have to convert to a muslim. Even though I know in my heart that my heart belongs to Jesus. Such is a battle between heavenly love and human love. Honestly, I am at a lost and full of guilt at not being able to give up the latter. I have found a wonderful man, who loves me and looks out for me and I am a lesser lover than him. I don't think i can ask for a better man. or I dnt think I can find a better man. An example of me with my human understanding and human powers.

Of course I ask myself if I will be damned for eternity by outwardly converting to Islam and maybe even having to carry out certain practices... Would I be damned?

Or would Jesus's love and my asking for forgiveness reconscile this and allow me to be with Him when the time comes?

And what about my spouse and my offspring? Do i leave them behind?

Or will God's power be strong enough for me to declare that even my household will convert someday?

Can I vehemently proclaim of God's power to save my family?

Without Jesus, I dare not even think of it. Jesus is the gamechanger. He is the Key to allowing us perpetual sinners to be saved and do be so daring as to ask for impossible things. But of course as a Christian, if you dare to ask, (faith the size of a mustard seed) God dares to supply.

So I boldy ask for forgiveness, I boldy ask God for the saving grace for me and my future family and even so much as to bring my family (including my parents) to Christ. All this in Jesus's Name. Without Jesus, how can I even be able to approach Daddy God...

As for this blog, I hope to still be able to quietly write in... my heart and my thoughts are my own and God's imprint in it will always be there.

On Christmas, I honor you Jesus. It's easy to get caught up with life and forget that none of this is possible without God, without your taking our sins away. I am safe and living and healthy because of you. May i never forget you, may my own quiet reflections be about you and our Father. Please continue to be with me even as I navigate the unfavourable path.

What is Christianity?

This is a question that I can't quite answer. All I know is I dont think its what alot of people view it to be.
Was having dinner and my housemates were watching Jesus Camp. Obviously I wanted to watch abit of it to see what they had to say. My housemate was saying how horrifying it was.
Through the bit that I watched..I was wondering what kind of Christianity these people had. IS it as horrifying or alien as the secular world thinks it to be? Was I like them? Were my beliefs different from theirs?
Obviously that led me to "what is Christianity"
I had a classmate who asked me if I was religious...Am I? What is the definition of "religious"?
I know I love God. I am not the strongest Christian...but I still love him.
So am I religious? Do i have an opinon on certain topics like homosexuality? drugs? Euthanasia?
I do and some of my reasons are due to my beliefs but does that make me religious? And if I dont have a strong view on topics that the Bible says it should or shouldnt be...does that mean Im not Christian? Or that I don't love Him enough?

I dont even have an answer to why calamities happen if God has control over this world.

But I know I still love Jesus. And didnt Jesus say that those who believe in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life?

Lord, you alone know who I am. You alone know my deepest fears and issues...Show me the asnwers to my questions Lord. Show me what is right or wrong...because I need to know whom I should be following...

God Bless

Loving Him

So i had a dream yesterday night. In the midst of that crazy dream, I had a boyfriend/husband and at a point of time of affection, I brought his arm up to me and hugged it and kissed his hand.
Yap..I know its something I really don't feel comfortable mentioning but I do because of my conversation with God.
Despite it being just a dream, I felt affection and love stiring in mt. Like how one could actually physically cry from their dream, I felt the love...for a fictitious guy in my dream of course. But I reckon that the reason why I can feel this is because Ive had the past experience of feeling that way and my body and mind has rememebred it and how it could possibly feel.
Anyway, as I walked to school today, I thought about it and as I thought of that incident, my heart felt that same love. especially as I was about to kiss his hand...
Then I started to ask God when I would ever have someone to love like that. To feel that kind of love for real. Because till I find that person, I can never feel the full extent of that..unlike in the dream...
God asked:" how about me?" Do you love me that much to feel such affection? Am I not worth that much to you? What does it feel to love me with all your heart? How do you think I feel when I love you?
And I recalled how Mary came, washed His feet, poured perfume on His feet and dried it with her hair. All this done with adoration for Him.
Could I do that? Would I feel as much love as her when I do that? Does she feel that kind of love when she did that?
Then the bigger question came from God: What would happen if I gave you such a person? What would happen to our relationship then..if you were to love him that much? Who would you adore more?
And I realized that He's right. That I need to know Him more and develop a stronger relatinoship with Him before Im good to have someone in my life.

Not to say that God means to keep me single till i gain that..but it also shows how much more I need to be trained or learn to get to a stable relationship with God.

I want to reach the point of adoration of God. Having positive expectation of God

God Bless

Jesus, Yeshua, Yeh Su, Yeh Soh,

So my friend and I were in woolworths grocery shopping for the week and as I wandered along the shelves, I heard a familiar hymn being sung from outside the store. It immediately caught my attention and I wanted to step out and find out who was singing it. Needless to say, it wasnt a bunch of buskers.

After paying for our things, I stepped out of the store and happened to look left, I saw a bunch of asians gathering together. One of them had a guitar and another older man was speaking tothe rest in Korean.

WIthout doubt, one can never mistake a christian. I mean a christian who has been taught the right way and is intuned with the Holy Spirit in Him. I  knew this group of people were a cell group.

what I wanted to say from this entry was how amazing Jesus name was present in every sentence that the guy said. Not that I know Korean..but no matter which language the name Jesus is said, one can never mistake the name.

And it didnt matter that the language was foreign to me. Every sentence had the word Jesus in it. And I didnt have to understand what He said to feel the peace that passeth understanding. I felt happy and peaceful just seeing them. Its something I cant explain but I felt happy. :) Maybe thats what the power of God's name can do...give a person peace with the mere mention of His name.

Maybe its because I havnt been in touch with God for a long while that seeing his presence made it sweeter. Especially since leaving Singapore after my Grandpa's death.

God Bless

Ning

Crossroads

I know I should be able to get more revelations than what Im churning out but theres no valid reason for it....
Anyway I was talking to a friend about God. She mentioned how she had a brother who was finding it hard to move on from his current job...
We started talking about his possible psychological barriers that stop him from getting up and going..but we also talked about God and how he chooses our paths...
Its easy to say that God leaves us to decide our fate..which seems true to some people...but to a certain extent, I dis agree with that. I believe our Father keeps his eyes on us and we His children never get shortchanged in life simply because we belong to Him.
Lets not think about non-christians who at the end of their lives, never got a good life...who never reached their dreams.
We as christians will be led by God into a land of milk and honey. ie: A place of satisfaction. with no fear of lack of food or riches. why I dont say that its a land of riches..is because having lots of riches isnt good for a christian too. Esp if one cant handle it. And God know who can and who can't. That said...if He wanted to, He would mould us into people who could deal with alot of riches properly.
But onroute to this end is where alot of Christians also have doubts. many people think that once they take a wrong turn, their out of God's favour..that He gives us only one turn to choose at the crossroad and once the wrong decision is made...we entirely stir off into a worse life.
I personally think that God never lets that single human decision be the final say.
If we go the wrong way, there will come another crossroad that He will give us..and we will choose. If it's wrong again, there will be another cross road and another...and another..all of which get us closer and closer to the destination He has called us to be in...despite the many detours we have decided to make.
We will eventually get there..point is...how long it will take.
Don't forget Psalm 23. "Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for you are with me"
He doesnt leave us even when we choose to walk throught eh valley of the shadow of death. ie: Our wrong decisions.
Note also that before this verse, allt eh other verses imply that He was hte one who led us to green pastures and provided for us.
Why I choose to believe all this? Is because God iss an all knowing God. He sees our lives from beginning to end in a single glance and knows where we make hte wrong turns even before we make them. He also loves us and definitely never intended to give us suffering that we cant handle. He wants us to kings and queens of this earth..to reign in this earth..to lend but not borrow.
So if he wants us to be that successful, why would he let us go forth from our wayward decisions just like that? What I think is that he has our curly detour riddled routes mapped out in front of him that eventually leads to where he wants us to be. Ever detour we make, he has a counter route that will bring us nearer. 2 steps back but 3 steps forward to the goal.
Obviously He would hope that we make hte right decision to start with and thats where the Bible and His word and His peace that passeth understanding comes in. Less distance to cover if we just made the right decision.
But If you think about how he already knows where we go in life...than whereever we go, and His plans to bring us back to Him...have always been Plan A. He is never caught offguard to our decision and be forced to contemplate a different counter route. The routes we take and the crossroads he gives us ahev always been Plan A, no matter how "screwed up" we are.
He never lets us take roads that we can't handle
:)
Id like to add that through our detours, we learn alot fo things too. things that help us to be better men and women when we reach our destination. When we get there, we become trained in Humility, faith, love peace etc that allows us to be lighthouses for Him, living examples of His love. In the process, we also catch hold of other non-believers and bring them on our journey..We are his Fishers of Men. Whicever route we take...so long as we have faith in Him...we bring light into that detour..the unreached corners...and shed light to others who will be motivated to walk with God to. Essentially...we have 2 purposes while walking detours. To learn and to fish.
Best of all...just like how it would work in the city....after the many detours, we know the city inside out. We know the nooks and crannys of the city as opposed to have only walking the main road...We know the place so well that we know where to go to spread the word...who to speak to..who needs help. etc.Wow....I had but a small msg to writ in this blog today....but I didnt realize just how much more God had to say when I type it out. He is constantly speaking mroe things to me as I type. He's constantly helping me to see and understand it deeper as I type. All this is just flowing in me as I type! Wow!
My heart is full... :)

God Bless

Spiritual attack!!!

Its been about 2months and Im still getting attacked by the irritating little demons.
 These little demons are making me ache all over and Im getting all sorts of weird aches and pains that Ive never had before...The more pain I got, the more pissed I was and just early this week, all my limbs were aching and I couldnt walk straight.

I feel like the devil has string plans to keep me down from something but I don't know what or why. With that kind of attack..I also wonder what kind of plans God has for me because as my Pastor has mentioned, the devil senses angelic activities around and maybe he senses some of that around me and is trying to stop something good from happening to me...

Whatever it is, I declare this war between me and the little demons and satan.

The pain has gone down but it's definitely not out...


God Bless